Thursday, June 15, 2006

DUNIYA GOAL HAI! pretty BORE bi hai!

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sniff..sniff...

I can't bear it any longer!!! "DUNIYA GOAL HAI" must be the lousiest, most intelligence-insulting show that ESPN-STAR has ever done!!! How could they stoop to such low standards??? I would expect stupid masala stuff like this for the ICC Cricket World Cup on DD sports or sumthin..where they happily whoo viewers with people like Mandira Bodi..Roshini..eeyyucccck! and then hold like 678,006 competitions...guess this..guess that..guess wats ur father's name! f*&%!!

See, I have always respected espnstar for their excellent content-filled programming. John Dykes, Andrew Leci, Steve Slater, Jason Dasey, Harsha Bhogle - great hosts. I bow down to them. They've got great pundits, take football for example, Gerry Armstrong, Jamie Reeves, Paul Masefield, Steve McMahon etc. These guys are brilliant and they make my football-viewing life complete and bliss.

Until now..
Now : Indianisation has kicked in...
Suddenly, we have Harsha Bhogle (the greatest football pundit that ever lived?) trying to keep the pace with the original footie boys, and he just can't keep off cricket can he? That shot was just like a Waqar Younis inswinger!...duhhh? and then Ravi Shastri speakin about Brazil.."you just can't control samba flair..." (When did he switch lanes?)

Now, I can accept and suffer all that BUT this-> in a pretty bold move to cater exclusively to the Indian public, espnstar has decided to roll down masala boulevard.."DUNIYA GOAL HAI"..the 30-min "fun-filled" filler football show that airs 30min before the 12:30am game. Everything about it is complete nonsense...Wait, I don't mind humour at all..football needs it.. BUT THIS??? I mean.. who are they trying to cater to here? A 17+ audience or an U-8 Tom n Jerry fan club? Gee...most of the jokes that are cracked make me wanna cry...or worshhtest case...put me off to sleep, which adds insult to injury cos I may miss the start/most of the primetime 12:30 match!!!

Ahh..the things that Ranvir (go back to [V] please), Andy Pendes (how could you Sundy boy?) and that fat "wahtitsname" guy do...ahh...please..we can do without the fake make-up..fake beer..the f*&%in whole show!!! The stupid modules they have..like the "B" news..(this part of the show was sponsored by Water. It's a liquid. killl meeee) , the sad match prediction techniques..like makin a mouse decide who wins, or droppin sausages...aaaaaaahh...and the foolish competitions..the prizes..a hand-waving hello to your mom is what you get if you win the caption contest?...Ugghhh.. They should hold a caption contest for that exact pose he does..that way we can have a recursive never-ending bloody competition!! The fake e-mail queries.."I am a player of Mohun Bagan and I'm switching to Liverpool next year. What should I ask as my pay package?"..C'mon get a life~!

I'm sure i'm not the only person with such views. Go to the espnstar feedback forum and you'll see them getting mothered there.

We are Indians. Yes.
But we Indians are not dumb and stupid.
We are not going to simply sit and accept this BS.

64 comments:

US said...

Seeing is believing. I also saw the totally out of sync show and switched out in less than 2 minutes.

The most irritating closing line was -
"Let's go, or wait, let us keep fans wait a bit longer before seeing Brazil play ... - sick laughter- ..."

??

My advice -
Buy a machine.
Get some good content.
Watch that in between matches.

--
US

Aravind said...

Fortunately or otherwise, I never bothered to even find put what the show was about. I saw 2 guys trying some crap, and realised that I was better off spending that half an hr watching the Ind-WI test match :))
(Not many are gonna agree with the cric part of my comment, I guess )

Jayasooryan said...

agree with u completely...and glad to know dat u 2 fall asleep due to their prematch BS...They are generalizing the Indian public to be wit-less fools...Its time someone launch a protest against this...

the trainee said...

see...now you know why i was trying to kill that Mandira "i-don't-know-what-to-say-but-i'll-blabber-anyways" Bedi...

She is the dufu who started all this shit...

Arrrrggghhhh...their sick humour and total ignorance of football is disgusting...as us said...just change channels...or even better tune out of espnstar till and 12:30 and then tune it back...will save you from any accidental exposure also...

Guru Panguji said...

Aaaah, finally!! Hehehe, I was planning on the same post today! Duniyo Goal Nahin hai bhaya! Learn your fucking Hindi properly! Duniya oval hai!

They completely mother the Indian football fans. How can they even call themselves hosts if they can't bloody respect the game! Anyhoo, forget that, what's up with the transvestites?

awwww tune us becks ko dekha...Kitne cute thaa woh Motherbiaatches better move on fast, else I am gonna stone ESPN star to death ;-)! Hehehe!!

Did you see day before y'day, Andy felt like a fish outta water, a man yearning for beer and getting Apple juice :-D!!

They are getting mothered! GOOD FOR THEM!! Indians aren't corny jokes people! We love subtlety! On-the-face is accepted as well, but not when it's demeaning our ability to reason!

IOW, Duniya Goal Nahin hain, Duniya Oval hai!! :-D!!

Guru Panguji said...

Damn, I should have just made a post outta it ;-)!

stan_da_man said...

@us: gotta get a laptop ASAP toy! and then i'll do wat u said!

@aravind: yup..i was doin sumtim similar too..where r u bro? thot u'd come here today! :)

@jayas: glad that u feel d same way too!! i missed the beginning of Italy n Brazil's matches due to those buggers!

@the_trainee: Mandira is the 'butt' of all jokes even years after 2 years! I think she still has nightmares about the last WorldCup!:)

@Pangu: hehee..hey man u o/p too many posts/day! take rest!!! :)) yea i understand the pain of hearin them say...awww...kitne cute thaaa!!! Arrrghhh!

Aslan said...

i agree.. 100.00%
F*** HARSHA BHOGLE.
i mute the TV in the initial few mins when he talks. yeah- how does the FIFA WC opening ceremony compare with the ICC WC OC? the audacity. it doesn't compare d*mmit. 'cuz this is a sport, not time-pass for some flabby losers who want to waddle up n' down a bitch, i mean, pitch, gripping stupid pieces of willow. india shud keep its nose outta soccer. playing, commenting, et al. just air it n' shut the f*** up.

Dream Sporting said...

Hey dude

I am sitting in the US and hearing every single piece of action in the game compared to some goddamn baseball play. And I longed for espnstar coverage based on their Premier League coverage. Looks like they aren't too well themselves. So, what about the match commentary itself? Is that good? Do they have good analysis pre and post match??

Here, after the France - South Korea game, one 'expert' at the studio mentioned how Korea got an equaliser close to the end and asked expert No2 for his opinion. He goes "There is good news and there is bad news. Good news is that the Brazilians are getting better. The bad news is that the US is going to have to play them if they qualify!!!" :(

stan_da_man said...

@aslan: agree man! cricket has affected everything we have here in India...i'm startin to get pissed off too!

@dream sporting: glad u understand..espnstar rocks with their EPL coverage..but the WC-show has been dissapointing.. btw, nice blog dude, good views!!

Guru Panguji said...

Btw, Sid loves "Duniya Goal hai" :-D!!

stan_da_man said...

@Pangu: lo..Sid? Truly...
btw, Fardheen the rat got his Italy-USA prediction right!! Unbelievable!!! Maybe there is some logic behind it all ;)

2 more sad ads they do:
This part of the programme was sponsored by:
The Moon - It Shine at Night!!
Rat - The world's no:1 rodent!!

Anonymous said...

I have started liking the show though!

Initially it felt irritating... but then if accept the harsh realities of life... (nothing else to watch) then you would actually start liking the show. Anyways, it is quite watchable when Andy and Vivek are hosts. Ranbir is a little bore.

But I love Fardin! He is the hero of the show

stan_da_man said...

@anon: lol...Fardin was right again in the Sweden-Eng match! intelligent rat!

Anonymous said...

Hey..I would say that I like that show in a way, though I hated it at first. Simply because it is better than the other shows that crop up on some f^$%#d channels like DD with those idiots like Mandira and the like.

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